campus man

This afternoon I'll be taking part in a neurology workshop at the UMN med school. First-year students will practice taking my medical history, then ask me basic diagnostic questions. My wheelchair is a pretty big clue to my condition, and I don't want to make it too easy for them, so here are a few things I'll say to throw them off.

• "It really hurts when I pee."


• "My sinuses sting — I think the fumes from my meth lab are getting to me."


• "Can you write me a prescription for ketamine? I'm going to a rave this weekend."


• "Are you familiar with Excitotoxicity? It's my favorite Def Leppard album."


• "I'm in a wheel chair because of a freak mosh pit accident at a Neil Diamond concert."

The last time I did something like this, I had fun. Hopefully today will bring a few laughs.

I love keeping med students on their toes.