Wednesday, August 6, 2008

I'm growing a hipster beard. Please sandblast my face.

I forgot to bring a razor to work this morning. As such, I'm now sporting a scruffy look. My little "soul patch" below my lower lip appears to grow faster than the rest of my beard.

I look like a hipster. Lord help me.

I already ride a single speed bike, which is very hipster-ish. At least it's not a fixie. Those are uber-hipsterish. Now I'm working on a soul patch 'I'm too cool to shave' look.

All I need are some tight pants, black socks & a white belt to complete the look. And maybe some PBR. The hipster beverage of choice. Hipsters, if you're reading this, High Life is a tastier cheap beer. Consider switching.

If you see me biking home today, please tackle & shave me. I'll leave my sidburns' length to your discretion. I think they're short enough to still be cool.

See? I said 'cool' instead of 'deck'. A true hipster would have said 'deck'. I don't know how deck became the new cool. I've been too busy shaving & not wearing vintage Chuck Taylors to keep up with the modern lexicon.

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